How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
We are magical, pot smoking, smart as hell, single as fuck, woodland dolphins.
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
Randomize
