Please forgive me. I will pay for your emergency room visit.
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
Woke up this morning with Nerf Bullets stuck to everything in my house and nut in my belly button. What exactly happened last night?
I wonder how horrible I look to customers. There's cuts all over my face and I can't talk.
What are the cuts from? Head-butting the bathroom light fixture?
Honestly that's best case scenario.
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
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