so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
Eating meat and looking at porn while roommate is at church for Ash Wednesday. Win.
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
Rule number one to being a good adult: don't use your vagina as an icebreaker. Just some wisdom I thought I'd pass down from experience.
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
That awkward moment when you are on your way to ICU and the only sympathy gift you can think of is beer and whiskey
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
He paid for a 5 star hotel suite and I raided the mini bar after he left. I think that’s bad karma. Want some pringles?
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
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