Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
he proceeded to punch 3 mailboxes in a row and when i asked him why, he said "because they were talking shit"... i need a new boyfriend. and a new life.
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
Randomize
