Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
Had to have a serious talk with my liver and remind it that it is my birthday weekend and there are three more nights like last night ahead of us
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
Your birthday is now over. Your day in the spotlight has dimmed and now you're as special as everyone else. The world goes back to revolving around me. Good night.
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize
