So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.
Together?
Preferably.
singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
Excuse me? I'm weird? You're the one sticking your penis into a pringles can.
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
Randomize
