plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
I just want to dump glitter on my floor and roll in it like a cat in catnip.
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
Randomize
