the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
I didn't pay for a single drink 'help me I'm poor' was my drink pickup line. it totally worked.
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
if you're wondering why I texted you some girl's name at 4 am it's because you wanted to Facebook stalk the girl who gave that Irish guy we met at the Chinese food place her license and said 'call me'
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
Randomize
