I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
#1 lesson to be learned from mardi gras this year: lock your car doors or some grimy dude like me might just bang in it and use your backseat as a kleenex
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
He changed the password on his Netflix account. The break up is official.
I passed up getting laid last night. It's almost been a YEAR - what the Hell was I thinking, being so choosy??
I was not drunk enough for that final.
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
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