Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
Randomize