nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
I just saw a bunch of drunk old guys riding on the side of a modified old fire truck yelling at cars and smoking while they looked for parking...promise we will be just like them when we grow up?
I'm craigslisting fire trucks as we speak
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
Look I'm sorry I stuffed your wife's bouquet toss but I won't have that weak shit in my house.
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
Randomize
