just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
well most of my day revolves around power hour
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
I'm unsure as to how you were able to snapchat me with your hands duck taped to beer, but I appreciated it nonetheless.
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
Today is all about not throwing up, where the fuck are my keys and does anyone know what happened to that guy in the panda suit my roommate had sex with last night.
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
Randomize
