Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
We walked in and found his glass coffee table broken and you in the bathroom throwing up saying "What a bad first impression."
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
Lost my credit card. M has a bottle of blood in her pocket from a hobo.
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
Is that strawberry winking at me??
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
Randomize
