That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
Tried to make hash outta one of those keurig machines. I don't know why. Maybe the drunkenness, but now I have mushy bud and no ganja
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
I just bought a handle of tequila and a breakfast burrito. I might be out of money for the weekend, but at least I have the necessities covered.
I'm gunna wear a purple dress, so if you see someone looking confused and lost wearing purple it's probably me
Randomize
