if your leaving for the weekend then im farting on your pillow
i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
ill drive you to the airport today if we can have sex first
i left yesterday
ill pick you up from the airport on sunday if we can have sex after
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
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