I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
I showed my boss the "She Wolf" video. He sent it to all his friends and told me to make us martinis...thanks Shakira and keep it up
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
If the blood belongs to whoever dumped glitter all over my couch than the motherfucker got what was coming to them. If not, I hope they're ok.
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
I think he thought I was too drunk to handle his parrot
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
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