Crap im kindd 0f drunkk we just hooked up in a mcdonalds parking lot but i dont know why how we are here
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
Do you have any idea how hard it is to iphone keyboard type "roflcopter" when intoxicated?
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
Randomize
