we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
The doctor said 'youre the 2nd youngest person that ive seen with this condition. Thats probably not the silver medal you were looking for today.'
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
We couldn't find him for like 4 hours. Turns out he was sitting under a tree and had thrown his phone in a lake because he couldn't figure out how to unlock it. Freshmen.
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
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