I don't think brook has ever known best
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
So we stole all of the newspapers out of the stands within a 1 mile radius and filled up her car with crumpled newspaper.
Who leaves their car unlocked at night?
Someone who wants to read the newspaper.
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
I'm at that stage of drunk where just imagining having sex makes me motion sick.
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
Randomize
