How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
Was not aware that standing loudly up off the couch and loudly, drunkenly slurring "I'M EIGHTEEN NOW BITCHES" counted as a primitive mating call.
Mass text: You have all failed me. How have the people I loved so much let me go so long in life without ever eating a McRib sandwich?!
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize
