Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
dont you remember the bouncer yelling at you while you were trying to piss?
no. why was the bouncer in the bathroom?
he wasn't. neither were you.
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
Houston, we have a squirter
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
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