It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
I'm mad at him and disappointed with you. It's like I put a bunch of effort into a PowerPoint of "what not to do with Zach" to show you and the first bullet point was "do not love him" and you're just disregarding all my effort and friendship.
I have to make mistakes myself to learn from them
FUCK YOU I AM MAKING A POWERPOINT
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
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