I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
I love millennial parents. One of the moms at the daycare center literally told me she and her husband named two of her kids after batman characters and one after game of thrones
Randomize
