but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
Welp, she's chewing our paper towels again. She's like an obnoxiously hot puppy
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
Woke up next to a half eaten California burrito. It was tucked in.
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
Nah. And this is true. It's like you were trained by sexual Jedi or something.
*jedi wave* this is the penis you were looking for
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
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