She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
Just met me in 10 years...this lady keeps an emergency wine cooler in her bag
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
my life is about to be the like the hunger games except with penises. and im going to win.
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
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