his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
is wine microwaveable?
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
Randomize
