So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
I had to use the resin knife to take the staples out of my tax return forms. Tax returns and a search warrant?
As your boss, I feel obligated to tell you that turning our management meeting into a kegger may just be the best idea you've given me yet.
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
What even was the context for that. All I have written down is "I would vote for President SnakeJaw."
How drunk are you?
Completed.
Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
Randomize
