I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
If it wasn't obvious enough to the cops that she was drunk, she threw in, "I like the colors of the lights because it makes purple."
We're celebrating his weight gain and arrest.and by we I mean I, and by celebrating I mean getting dangerously drunk
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
Randomize
