Why don't I have your new number? And who have I been texting?
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
There's a naked kid on the floor on your side of the bed. Don't freak out when you wake up. I think we need to fix the lock on the door...
they're like a gay fantastic four
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
Randomize
