Whats the glycemic index on semen?
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
Kinda awkward to hear your aunt complain about loose women when you're in town to be a stunt dick for a swingers convention. Just sayin.
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
What's a nice way of saying 'I wish I hadn't fucked you.'
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize