i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
Randomize
