I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
I hope they realize that to me "collecting their mail" is synonymous with "fucking in every room in their house, and twice in the party shower."
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
When you get this divorce finalized we're going to mid evil times AND pirate dining adventure. We're gonna find you a couple of real men and make them joust/swashbuckle for your affection. My treat.
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
Randomize
