Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
so this guy on craigslist is offering a case of beer to shave his back. i think i'm gonna take him up on it.
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
Randomize
