what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
You're boyfriend is farting in his sleep. The last one sounded like a threat.
But, I don't have the body of a porn star, so nobody would hire me. Unless they're doing like a trip to the safari and they need an albino rhino
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
Even though I wasn't drunk last night, I peed in the sink just so I could keep my record going
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
You came home screaming the lyrics to Drunk in love, and dumped wine on me when I said you would never be Beyoncé
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
