return my video game
every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
I'm going to preface tonight by saying that I'm sorry for tequila, shopping carts, and having to chase me.
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
Randomize
