i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
Randomize
