So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
She told me I was lying in front of her toilet for an hour saying "lasers."
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
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