We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
You know you're fucked up when you decide to pour fireball whiskey in your vegetable beef soup
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
Randomize