LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
why is it whenever you puke in the park there are always little kids on the swings?
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
Randomize
