she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
Stuck behind a lady in her 70's purchasing a plastic handle of vodka and nothing else. She is writing a check. Hello future.
trust me, there is no more disappointing feeling in the world than waking up at 4 in the morning with a random half naked chick in your bed and then realizing your roommates girlfriend just wandered into the wrong room.
Every time she shows up on my newsfeed, I get the taste of tequila in my mouth.
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
apparently the last bar didn't like my halloween costume with syringes filled with whiskey
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
He looked so uninterested when the stripper was slapping him. Now his roommates are harassing me about how crazy our sex must be.
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
Randomize
