i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
We found you passed out clutching your purse. There was 16oz of unopened cheddar cheese inside. You just kept saying SALSA YES.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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