I should be sponsored by Trojan
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
Just got that "I know what's going on with your vagina" look from that CVS cashier.
You bought MORE?!
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
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