I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
i woke up surrounded by junior mints. not to mention, there was a huge pyramid of natty cans baracading the door shut. this is why i can't drink alone.
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
Naked Twister starts at high noon
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
Randomize
