You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you.
I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige.
I just want to make him a cookie cake that says "you have no chance with me."
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
So the pizza place just called me after an hour saying they don't have dough
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
Randomize
