i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
She tied me up with her honor cords...
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
I woke up remembering only that I got pulled over by a cop, then looked over and found that same cop, naked.
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
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