I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
Somehow ended up home, probably had something to do with the makeshift ladder from my second story window. Now headed to church, still drunk, and still fighting back the vomit of a thousand different alcohols. Successful night.
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
we need to open a bar. a bar with... wait for it... A FUCKING BALL PIT.
LOL. Do you guys need a ride home?
No. we're home already. i just thought it was a brilliant fucking idea.
hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
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