She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
You were sending me snapchats from a bathtub with your beer helmet on and your boobs out.
The psychic I saw today told me NOT to text the guy I haven't heard from yet since our first date this weekend b/c it wouldn't go anywhere...Miller light said otherwise. Miller light > Cleo
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
I yelled out "blow jobs!" in my macroeconomics class. Ask me more about how my life is spiraling out of control.
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
Randomize
