oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?
In other news, I just burned my penis
If the fate of the world hinged on some chubby girl getting laid, the president would dispatch me with a fifth of Jameson immediately and then rest easy.
He said he discovered the mysteries of the universe inside an orange... I want whatever he was on.
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
Randomize
