scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
you have to be so drunk to ignore a taser
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
She just told me she blew the waiter in the bathroom. Should I still leave a tip?
I tried really hard to get you laid last night. And by that I mean I asked a bunch of dudes if they were top or bottom.
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
I can't believe I'm coordinating a threesome at work. My productivity is at an all time low.
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
Randomize
