you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
I gave the bathroom attendant $5 last night for turning the sink on for me. What. The. Fuck.
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
Please tell me you woke up next to the hot one cause his ugly friend is still snoring in my bed and my favorite panties are ripped.
Wingwoman of the year. I'll buy you dinner tonight and a new thong. It was THAT good.
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
My orgasm happened in two different decades
Randomize
