I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
Just so you know, a true one night stands ends with a 7 minute blow job after eating a sandwich she made for you while the taxi you called for her comes
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
Perfect. And my grandma just called me and talked to me for eighteen minutes telling me that she was worried because of my Halloween costume that I'm not a Christian and that I'm not eating. Wtf.
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
Pro tip: When you spend the afternoon banging your boss, don’t meet your mother-in-law for dinner if you still smell like cum and watermelon flavored lube
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